He Just Kept Shooting

I once met a stranger during one of those sidewalk art galleries I use to attend. He was another artist. I noticed he was a very frail man. His artwork was indescribable, the kind of art that one must have mastered throughout a long period of time. The paintings and sculptures composed of people, many people; they depicted jubilance, togetherness, and love. I complemented him and asked where he gets his inspiration. "Art is all I have", he replied. I thought for a second, wondering what he could possibly mean. Before I could respond he abruptly said, “I am a heroin addict.” I did not know what to say; I stood there silently until I softly said, “oh.”

He has been shooting heroin for 25 years. It started from sniffing cocaine and he moved up to using needles. It took over his life. He use to work as a construction worker and had a wife and two children. His family left him and he has not seen them for 10 years. I could not imagine losing my family and not being able to see them for that long. I was thinking to myself, how can you do this to yourself? How can you just ruin your life because you love getting high? These simple questions I asked myself, they cannot answer either. It is more complex than that. Unlike most other drugs for recreational use, heroin does not stay recreational. 

“It took over my life.” He thought he had control over it, but it really had control over him. He lived day to day with only one goal; shoot heroin. It happens way too often. In the United States alone there are roughly 3 million heroin users. On average an addict spends $150-200 per day to supply their addiction (GDCADA). Surprisingly, this man survived 25 years of shooting heroin; survived 25 years of possible over dosage. He told me he tried to get help multiple times but ended up shooting again and again.

So here he sits next to his sculpture of a man and a woman holding hands along with their two children. I see the wretchedness in his eyes. The irony that a drug that is suppose to numb physical pain could cause so much emotional pain. The drug that could possibly kill him is what is keeping him alive. It is sad how often one dies off drug addiction. It only accumulates problems and never solves anything. I am saddened to say that I never seen him again.